Managerial Race Heats Up

Apart from the first, these names are in no particular order of importance or likelihood, so don't come crying to me if my list prompts you to place a bet on the whole sorry affair that you then lose.

Joe McLaughlin - Fans welcomed the return of former on-pitch favourite McLaughlin as youth coach earlier this year. The ailing youth setup at Morton apparently needed a boost, with the nurturing of great young players Jim McAllister and Dean Keenan counterbalanced by reported incidents of poor man management and training setups that had more than one player leave the club in anger last year.

McLaughlin, with his coaching pedigree in no doubt following success as assistant at Mark McGhee's Millwall side, seemed an obvious choice. With former youth boss Steven Frail nudged gently sideways into the welcoming bosom of the manager to play Tonto to his Cowboy, McLaughlin was given control over the youth setup. However, we can't really judge him on his successes or failures, as only a few weeks into the job, the Two Horsemen were run out of town on a rail, with McLaughlin placed in temporary charge of first team affairs.

24 hours into his administration the team had notched up a point at Forthbank, ending Stirling's 100% league record and restoring a little faith to the slightly depleted Morton travelling army.

Questions remain as to whether or not his taking over was planned from the beginning, but in the meantime, McLaughlin has already the backing of much of the supporter base and must be considered favourite for the job.

Paul Lambert - The latest bizarre rumour to surface is that Paul Lambert, currently on sabbatical from Celtic to earn his coaching stripes in Germany, is to arrive at Cappielow in a player-manager role. However, given that the last bizarre rumour was that Cowboy had been sacked on the afternoon before a match following a bust-up at training, it can't be discounted altogether. The voters over at Bishop Bannerman Online like the look of this guy - he's in 2nd place in the manager voting, only 8% behind McLaughlin - but others might fear that another Old Firm player looking to break into management might result in the same lacklustre performances as those under Dave McPherson. However, Lambert arguably played at a higher level for longer than Big Slim, including for Borussia Dortmund at the height of their success. He has certainly done much to earn coaching qualifications, too - but, then again, so had Cowboy.

Steve Paterson - Reportedly looking to get back into football, Pele would bring with him a wealth of lower-league experience, including great success with Inverness Caledonian Thistle, and perhaps even an array of contacts in the Highlands to help Morton uncover some Scottish talent to plug the much-publicised holes in our squad. He would also bring with him the looming spectre of dramas involving his personal life - meaning at least he'd be able to compare notes with some of the first team squad - and a disastrous campaign with Aberdeen that culminated in a sacking. Certainly an outside shot due to wage demands and geographic location, as well as those personal issues, but his successes should be remembered.

Sandy Clark - Some younger viewers might not remember him. Others certainly will - an experienced campaigner at Hearts and Hamilton, he later helped take St. Johnstone to an unprecedented 3rd place finish in the SPL, leading some to claim that the big-spending Perth side were indeed the third force in the Scottish game. When everyone had stopped laughing at this preposterous notion and wiped the tears from their eyes, they did acknowledge almost to a man that Clark was instrumental in the Perth side's success. However, he's done very little within the game since then, instead offering pearls of wisdom to those who partake of the BBC's Scottish football coverage. An outside chance to be sure, but one certainly not to be ignored.

Peter Hetherston - One certainly to be ignored.

Allan Moore - Memorably described as a "jug-eared skunk", Moore's short but happy managerial life culminated in a 2nd place promotion spot for Stirling Albion last season, and a blistering start to this season that's seen the Binos drop only two points in six games, to a team whose name I can't quite remember. Anyway, Moore will be an unpopular choice for some, given his connection with "them up the road", but given full-time resources and a large support base, who knows what he's capable of? We probably won't find out, as chances are he won't be appointed and may prefer to remain at Stirling in any case.

Paul Sturrock - Seemingly from even further out in left field than the Lambert rumours, Sturrock's name is one that I elected to add despite a lack of credence given elsewhere. However, with large amounts of money allegedly being offered to players over the summer, chairman DDF Rae, eager for success, may opt to divert those funds into bringing the former Southampton gaffer back into the Scottish game. From Premiership wages to tea and toast at Bridge of Weir is certainly an outlandish idea, but one that might not be too far off the mark. Definitley an outside chance, in that I must be "outside" my head to be considering it at all.

Brian Fairley - Allegedly cultivator of a great team spirit at Dumbarton, this manager has ties to the junior game and a keen eye for a good player. He could be the sort of guy needed to bring harmony back to a squad laden with drama queens and primadonnas, but on the other hand, a poor start to the season with the Sons might lead some to believe that he simply isn't up to it.

Gordon Strachan - We can dream, right?

Dave McPherson - Apparently, we can also have nightmares.

Rowan Alexander - Really bad ones.

John McVeigh - And then wake up screaming.

Campbell Money - Honourable mention here for the former Saint Murn "goalkeeper". Div from B&WArmy suggested this joker, apparently in all seriousness, following his descent from the dizzy heights of first place in Division 1 to benedict his wisdom upon the saucer-eyed peons of Greenock. He mooted such men as Kevin McAllister to be suitable for the Morton job, but the proposal that Money, who oversaw only 17 wins in his time at Ayr United over the course of almost two seasons, surely takes the cake. Apparently Money did "well" on few resources at Ayr; quite how 8th place followed by ignominious relegation is a doing well is something that needs some explanation, but it's doubtless true that life after Bill Barr was going to be tought at Somerset Park. However, given that Morton are not in the same financial situation as Ayr, his relegation-defying tactics will hopefully not be required here, and he can be filed safely under "not going to happen."

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